Random thoughts from one sleepy mama

I should be in bed sleeping. My kids are. My hubby probably is sleeping, TV is going but I bet he is sleeping. Here is a warning for you as the title of this post suggests, there will be lots of random comments............. I'm in a random mood, one minute I will be talking about something and then out of blue I'll start a totally different conversation. Just ask my little girl. This weekend I let the kids both have a friend over Saturday night for a sleepover. Hannah and her friend went to sleep at 2:30 am. So, Sunday she was a little cranky. Okay a lot cranky. On the way home from Hayden's game I told her that if she could not be responsible and get more sleep and not be cranky the next day she could not have any more friends stay over. To which she replied "That was random". Nope, no lead into the discussion, just random, random and from one feeling to the next.

That is how things are these days........ random......... no warning for feelings or emotions or what might come from ones mouth. Some things I really want to say and get out there I'm not quite sure how to even start. Things are awkward at best around the Bailey house. Some things I say and wish I would've kept to myself. This is just part of this life, learning to cope and find our new normal in this world without dad.

So, the rest of my random thoughts are as follows:

Try to find peace if you are stressing.......... seriously, life is way to short........... case is point........ Dad was only 62, some kids who pass away are only 9............. so life is too short to worry or hold grudges or think about what you should've said .......... way, way too short.................. remember this guys........ learn lessons even in death

Every time, I clean my glasses off I think about Dad and how while he was sick he would take my glasses from me and clean them and say "Now I bet you can really see"

Making mac and cheese brings back memories 100 fold.............. to mac and cheese at 1:00 am to the steps back and forth to Dad's room to make sure you got it just right. When making mac and cheese for the kids I find myself wondering would this be Dad worthy or would it get sent back to the kitchen?

When I see the post it note at my desk that says "check blood sugar and call Dad" I think of all the times he would call just to check in on me; how I do miss those conversations. I still have Dad's mobile number programmed in my cell phone. Can't bring it to myself to actually delete it just yet.

I miss my Dad.......... I want to call him and bounce things off him. I miss, miss him.

Off to bed, maybe I'll catch some of Dad in my dreams somewhere.

Hugs everyone. Seriously, it is almost 1:00 in the morning. Why can't I turn my mind off and get some sleep.